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This Fickle Heart

Month

March 2017

DAY 8: A song about drugs or alcohol

Thrash Unreal – Against Me!

Thoughts:
I’m going to be honest the first song that came to mind when I was thinking of a song for Day 8 was Love Me by Lil Wayne. But gave it some more thought and felt this song better suits the day and me. I recently read LJG’s book, Tranny: Confessions of Punk Rock’s Most Infamous Anarchist Sellout, and if I remember correctly she worked at a bar with this lady many years back and this song is kind of about her. After closing they would hangout, drink, do drugs, hookup, and listen to music while they were closing the bar for the night.

I LOVE Against Me! and LJG. So much love in my heart for them. I’ve seen them twice in concert and both times were so amazing. They were doing a meet and greet at a record shop the next town over and I wanted to go so bad. I just wanted to hug all of them and tell them I think they are great and thank them. I wouldn’t of wanted an autograph, maybe not even a picture just wanted to hug them and thank them. I didn’t end up making it out there though. Probably for the best, I would of ended up just smiling at them, not saying anything, nod my head, and then walk away. Hahaha.

Memory:
Oh Against Me! you are the foundation of one of my friendships and for that I am grateful. A few years ago I was working a summer job in another state. There was this one guy who had worked there a few summers and I really liked him. It was definitely one of those rare moments where you just like someone the instant you meet them, with nothing to go off of but the vibe they put out. We started talking about the music we like because I just want to know what/who everyone likes and why, when it comes to music because it’s both fascinating and insightful. We both really loved Against Me! and Mumford & Sons (which someone this year told me is an interesting combo because they both happen to be two of my favorite bands). He had been a fan of there’s forever. I had just recently discovered them a year or two prior thanks to this girl I watched on YouTube. Honestly at the time I think I only knew and loved Thrash Unreal. Which is funny for two reasons: 1) I had developed this weird habit that summer where if I felt uncomfortable or didn’t know what to do (90% of the time) I would scratch the underside of my elbow. When my friend noticed I was doing this he referenced this song, “when people see the track marks on her arms, she knows what they are thinking” because it looked like I was trying to hide something (I wasn’t btw). 2) A few months ago, he was introducing me to one of his friends and he said this song was essentially the reason we became friends.

Anyways, we bonded over our love for Against Me! and our friendship just grew from there. I’m not the best at keeping in touch with people but here we are today still friends. Both shows I’ve gone to were with him. I guess you could say it’s like our unofficial “thing”. It’s because of him I love a lot of the bands I love today; Gaslight Anthem and The Black Keys are prime examples. So this song is near and dear to my heart. It kicked off the start of a beautiful friendship and helped grow my love for Against Me! in general.

Favorite Line:
“This night is gonna end when we’re damn well ready for it to be over. Worked all week long, now the music is playing on our time. Yeah, we do what we do to get by, and then we need a release”

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DAY 7: A song to drive to

Put Me In the Car – Ryan Gosling

Thoughts:
You know it really depends where you are driving. My go to, must have for driving on the interstate in a big city are The Black Keys. They just give me all this confidence, make me feel badass, and help me focus. Like, “No sir you will not cut me off!” or “I can totally merge onto this exit safely.” It’s weird, I know but it works so let me be. When I’m on long drives on old highways I need to listen to songs I can sing along to, obviously. Windows down, blue skies, jams on blast…perfection. Then there’s drives you go on to just get out and think. For that you need some quality folk rock acousticness. Or driving my brother around, just cruising, listening to hip hop and driving down back roads or all over the city.

But this song…it’s a hidden gem, I think. I like driving and listening to music with no real agenda or plan on where I’m going. It just helps you put things into perspective, one could say it helps you feel free again. I love love love this song.

Memory:
I remember going through my, “I’m obsessed with Ryan Gosling” phase. I think it started when I found out he was a musician. I found this song and then discovered Dead Man’s Bones. I listened to this song a lot in college. I tend to get easily overwhelmed by my thoughts (who doesn’t?) and I use to just escape the overthinking, overanalyzing, irrelevant stuff by laying on my bed and listening to this song (since I didn’t have a car at school for the first year or two). Like I said I really love driving, which is funny because I didn’t get my license until I was 17; which is not unreasonably late but still.. When I lived with my brother and when I visit him, we like to just listen to music and drive around town. I grew up going on long road trips with my family. My brother and I would even go on drives with our dad at least twice a month out of town for his work. There’s a sort of comfort I find on the road especially roads I have traveled on multiple times throughout my life. So I really “connected” with this song you could say; just put me in the car and drive, anywhere. Let me get that fresh air and ground myself.

This song also has a romantical aspect to it. And I’m like low-key super into (that might be an oxymoron…) romance, ugh. Just the idea of having a companion that’ll go on a long drive with you and essentially tell you everything you are worried about is in your head. Then they kiss you and you start to feel like everything will be all right. Swoooon!

I’m sure the original meaning or inspiration for this song is completely different than what I think it is. But this was kinda of my interpretation of it and what it means to me.

Favorite Line:
“Darkness thinks I’m pretty and the rain covets my soul …”

DAY 6: A song that makes you want to dance

Complicated – Fitz and The Tantrums

Thoughts:
Funny enough I created a playlist on Spotify recently called “We Should Probably Dance” so I can keep track of songs I can dance to, haha. I only had two songs on there so far, this song and Stitches by Shawn Mendes. Other songs that should probably be on there: Shape of You by Ed Sheeran and Love on the Brain by Rihanna. I picked this song though because I CANNOT listen to it and NOT dance or bop around in my chair (because sometimes I listen to it at work). Pop songs are my go to dance music.

I wish I could be a badass dancer. I mean I wish I had badass ballerina skills (I did ballet as a kid but my instructor got married and I didn’t like my new studio so I quit…classic me), in sync hop hop moves (like Step Up used to be one of my favorite movies), and even smooth ballroom expertise. But atlas I feel like such an idiot when I dance so I’ll just keep jumping around in the comfort of my home, continue to swing my hips and bop up and down at shows, and on a rare occasions make an appearance in da club.

Memory:
I recently saw Fitz and The Tantrums. I’m familiar with a handful of their songs. Out of My League was like my song for awhile. I heard Complicated (I think the first time) at that show. And I was like, Oh my god…I LOVE this. They make great upbeat, dancey music and put on a pretty good show. I will say the solos felt a little long at times, that would be my only criticism.

But that was a great day. I got to hang outside with my best friend, soaking up the sun and listening to music; making of my ideal day. Quality day. Local “smaller” festivals are my jam. None of this Coachella, Bonaroo, etc. There’s just too too too many people and the crowds always seem like a crap shoot. Ya’ll need to hit up your local festivals and smaller venues, you can see some quality musicians when you keep a pulse on the scene.

Favorite Line:
“Yeah you! Don’t you know, you’re a wild animal! Broke my heart in two every time you got to go!”

This was just a fun day so I didn’t have a lot of insight or meaning I wanted to address, sorry!

DAY 5: A song that needs to be played LOUD

Guys…it’s been a hot minute. I’m sorry I got a little sidetracked and was struggling to find a good song for this day. But I think I got one, so let’s do this AND continue to do this!

When My Time Comes – Dawes

Thoughts:
So like I mentioned I really struggled with this one, I have no clue why. Every song felt forced. Originally the first songs that came to mind where all Fall Out Boy songs: Grand Theft Autumn, Alone Together, Miss Missing You, etc., etc. Mostly songs from my youth or songs I know all the words to because when you know the words to a song you just can’t sing the song, you got to crank up the volume and belt it out. Because you know the song and you need everyone to know that you do because you’re just THAT badass, obviously. But on Thursday I had the pleasure of attending, An Evening with Dawes (front row, great crowd, low-key fell in love with Taylor (sorry Mandy Moore), high-key one of the best concerts evahh).. Anyways… they played this song and it hit me. This is it, this is the song I ALWAYS play AND sing loud, so how could I not choose this song?!

Memory:
The first time I saw Dawes I had never heard of them before. I went to Gentlemen of the Road in Salida (best decision of my life to attend that festival..btw) and they played the first night, right before Flaming Lips…maybe? There were these three or four guys in front of me who were there to see them and then this group of girls who stood next to me. One girl in particular was super stoked to be there (her friends even mentioned driving a few hours just so she could see them). And when they came out it was like the best day of her life and it was just the raddest thing to witness. She was singing, dancing, and possibly a few tears might of fallen; it was so cool.

I’m really bad when it comes to concerts. What I mean by that is I like a band before I see them in concert (most of the time), I know “enough” about them and their songs. BUT I always leave a bigger fan than I came in being; 9 times out of 10. No…maybe 10 times out of 10. Because I REALLY love Mumford & Sons but I left those shows loving them even more than I did before the show (somehow). My point is I like to go to shows for the music/artists (obviously) but I also like to go to watch the fans. The people who love these people with all there hearts and know all the words and are like…just so happy to be there. Ahh, it’s one of my favorite things! It warms my heart and just makes me really happy. I know that feeling but it’s a very intimate, vulnerable, personal feeling I don’t openly display. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve watched YouTube videos of my favorite artists low-key tearing up saying, “I love them! They’re so great! I just want to hug them! D’awww!” So I love seeing people like that at concerts.

Back to Dawes, haha, so this girl loved them and was having the time of her life. And I’m sitting there thinking these guys are pretty good. Their fans LOVE them for good reason, they’re amazing. And I wanted to share in this girl’s intense love for them. I don’t know her, don’t even know her name but I want to connect with her and this band because look at her. You see someone love something so fully and you want to be apart of it and share that love as well (that sounds weird…whatever). So I came home after that trip and bought all their albums; which is rare for me. I’m usually a song here, a song there, kind of person (I know..I know, I’m the worst). But Dawes was just great, I loved it all, I wanted it all, I got it; it all made sense. Dawes makes great music, they put on a great show, and I bet any Dawes fan you come across is a really rad, really cool, awesome person (I say that because I recently found out two of my favorite people love them and I was like of course you do, you have great taste in music! Not because I like Dawes…come one guys give me more credit than that). Did this get weird? A little bit? Sorry guys…

Uhh song story short…this song needs to be played loud and you have to sing the chorus loud. You just have to.

Favorite Line:
“You can judge the whole world on the sparkle that you think it lacks… You can stare into the abyss but it’s staring right back…”

DAY 4: A song that reminds you of someone you would rather forget about

Stellar – Incubus

Thoughts:
I really enjoyed Incubus during my teen years. Drive was probably the first song of theirs that I liked. Then Wish You Were Here, that ones a classic. They have some pretty great guitar work. Incubus is good chilling out music or background music while you’re working on something. With Stellar I felt like they did a good job at creating a outer space, floating in the stars type of vibe. They actually give off that whole vibe to me with most of their songs which is probably why I think it’s good chilling out music.

Memory:
High school boyfriend loved Incubus, need I say more? I always liked them, he loved them, which ended up with them being a little tainted. Super unfortunate for me. I think this was his favorite song of theirs. So every time I hear it I roll my eyes. He was teaching himself how to play the guitar and he would play me some songs over the phone; Stellar was one of them. One Year, Six Months and Hey There Delilah are a few other songs that initially generate the same type of reaction. Ex-boyfriends who ruin music/songs for you are the worst…

Favorite Line:
“Meet me in outer space. I will hold you close if you’re afraid of heights. I need you to see this place…”

DAY 3: A song that reminds you of summertime

Kiss A Girl – Keith Urban

Thoughts:
For some reason when it starts to warm up outside, I find myself listening to country music like Keith Urban, Luke Bryan, Lady Antebellum, etc. I have no clue why. I listened to a lot of country in the car with my dad growing up but even then it was 90s – 00’s country. This type of music just sounds good with the windows rolled down, cruising down the road.

Memory:
My first memory of liking a Keith Urban song is when my family was on vacation and You’ll Think of Me was constantly on the radio. I just loved the line, “Take your cat and leave my sweater ’cause we have nothing left to weather.” He doesn’t actually say “cat” I think he says “cap” but I always thought it was cat. It seemed like such an odd thing to tell someone to take, “I don’t want the cat, you take it. But that sweater! I NEED that back.” Hahaha.

This song though, I found on someone from work’s Myspace page, I know…random. But I was like this is such a fun song so I downloaded it. I would listen to it while I rode my bike around town. I’d go to this lake near where I was living at the time and just sit there by the shore…beach…whatever you call it and listen to music. So this song makes me think of that time in my life; warm late afternoon bike rides that bled into cool summer nights .

It also makes me think of the person’s whose Myspace page I found this song on. I think he had gotten out of a relationship and could relate to this song or something? I don’t remember… But connecting our emotions or states of being to music is so fascinating and powerful. I don’t know how many times I’ve used music to convey my thoughts and feelings. I’m just like, “Ahh! That! That’s how I feel! They articulated it so well! Listen to this, really listen to it and you’ll understand!” I mean that’s what I’m saying in my head, out loud I’m just like “Hey, listen to this song.. good huh?” Internally scream: “That’s how I feel! Get it?!”

Favorite Line:
“But the night is young, and it’s been awhile…”

DAY 2: A song you like with a number in the title

7 – Catfish and the Bottlemen

Thoughts:
This song is great. This band is great; they are totally underrated. This song makes me think about when you like someone and you kind of want to be with them but you have a lot of shit you need to deal with or you’re just not in the right place to be in a relationship. You’re just trying to do you and you know if you take the time for them you’ll get caught up in it all and put yourself on the back burner. So you try to remove yourself from the situation best you can without coming off a complete asshole and potentially putting yourself in a position where you lose them. Talk about relatable, amirite? No? Just me? Fair enough.

Memory:
I saw these guys in…August or September, when they opened up for Mumford & Sons. I had heard one or two songs before then. The day before the show though, I was staying with my brother in Denver and I was jamming to this song while I was getting ready. I was super stoked about seeing Mumford & Sons but wanted to familiarize myself a little more with Catfish & the Bottlemen. And this song just gets me real pumped and amped; that chorus though. They were great live; I wish the crowd was more pumped though. I just wanted to sing and jump around while they performed. So great. Such an amazing show. Love, love, love.

Favorite Lyric:
“I love you but I need another year alone.”

DAY 1: A song you like with a color in the title

Green Eyes – Coldplay

Thoughts:
I love this song… It’s so sweet and romantical (yes, I know that’s not an actual word). I always love listening to love type songs and wondering who they are singing about, their relationship with that person, where they both stand now…just all the details. I’m not a songwriter but someone has to stir up a lot of feelings in you for you to write a song for them. I’ve related my feelings for other people to songs my whole life. So I’m always curious if the feelings I tie to songs are similar to the ones that inspire the songs. But sometimes it’s better not to know.

Memory:
A memory I have attached to this song is sitting on a rock in the middle of the night with my college boyfriend. There’s this winding road that leads up to the school we went to. One of the first few times we hung out we went for a walk and ended up sitting on a rock on the side of the road, looking up at the sky. We listened to this song together and it was my first time hearing it and I fell in love instantly. My favorite line is below, we both had kind of found each other at the right time and were kind of what each other needed. So those lyrics tie into that moment perfectly.

Favorite Lyric:
“I came here with a load and it feels so much lighter now I met you”

*I like this format…I think I’m going to plan on doing this each time.

The Comeback

Huzzah! I’m back at it again. And hopefully this time I’ll be sticking around for awhile. I came across this article that had a 30 Day Music/Song Challenge and I really want to participate. So for the next 30 days (or so…) I will be doing the following challenge and I’m low-key pumped about it so stay tuned. And if you decide to do this too or already have please let me know and let me know where I can read/listen to it at.

The Challenge

  1. A song you like with a color in the title
  2. A song you like with a number in the title
  3. A song that reminds you of summertime
  4. A song that reminds you of someone you would rather forget about
  5. A song that needs to be played LOUD
  6. A song that makes you want to dance
  7. A song to drive to
  8. A song about drugs or alcohol
  9. A song that makes you happy
  10. A song that makes you sad
  11. A song that you never get tired of
  12. A song from your preteen years
  13. One of your favorite 70’s songs
  14. A song that you would love played at your wedding
  15. A song that is a cover by another artist
  16. One of your favorite classical songs
  17. A song that you would sing a duet with on karaoke
  18. A song from the year you were born
  19. A song that makes you think about life
  20. A song that has many meanings to you
  21. A favorite song with a person’s name in the title
  22. A song that moves you forward
  23. A song that you think everybody should listen to
  24. A song by a band you wish were still together
  25. A song by an artist no longer living
  26. A song that makes you want to fall in love
  27. A song that breaks your heart
  28. A song by an artist with a voice that you love
  29. A song that you remember from your childhood
  30. A song that reminds you of yourself

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